Category Archives: Boys

The Disciplined Man

Posted on 01/09/2012 by caygin

A soldier who thinks too much – who thinks independently – is not much use to the military. A soldier who questions is worse than useless to the military. The useful soldier is one who obeys the rules that are … Continue reading →

Posted in Boys, Masculinity, Parents, War | Tagged boy scouts, bullying, military training, obey without question, ritual, segregate boys, soldier, thinks independently | Leave a comment

The ‘Patriot’ who Must Win No Matter What.

Posted on 30/05/2012 by caygin

Competitiveness has both positive and negative qualities. Competitiveness is not negative in essence. It is an important natural part of human behaviour and is necessary for progress. But on the negative side, it can be warped into aggression and repugnant … Continue reading →

Posted in Boys, Masculinity, Parents, War | Tagged affirmation of masculinity, aggression, better than the enemy, brutality, Bush, Competitiveness, dehumanises, fallacy of patriotism., fear, ignore ethical rules, instability of masculinity, masculine dominance, patriotism, shame, sons, sport, torture, Vietnam, water-boarding | Leave a comment

Tough Enough

Posted on 24/03/2012 by caygin

Soldiers, of course, are required to be tough. Strong and tough like Rambo. No-one must be able to get the better of them physically. As if we were still fighting hand-to-hand combat, and did not rely nowadays on sophisticated weapons. … Continue reading →

Posted in Boys, Masculinity, Parents, War | Tagged acting-out, bullying, fear, guilty, not born tough, pretence, rational solutions, shame, sissy, soldiers, tough, vulnerability, war-machine, weak men, weapons | Leave a comment

Stoicism – the Endurance of Pain

Posted on 17/03/2012 by caygin

The military values stoicism – the silent endurance of pain (both physical and emotional). Soldiers are asked to be stoical and resilient in the face of all hardship. They must be mentally strong. They must be controlled enough to endure … Continue reading →

Posted in Boys, Masculinity, Parents, War | Tagged badge of honour, communication, competitive sport, endure pain, military prevent emasculation of nation and men, non-masculine, prefects assert power, primitive initiation rites, psychologically crippled, relationships, sexual abuse, soldiers, stoical, suffer stoically and silently, unhealthy, weak | Leave a comment

The Hero

Posted on 10/03/2012 by caygin

One of the ways that society seduces men into becoming soldiers (for the benefit of the military) is by linking ‘real’ masculinity, patriotism and heroism together. From early childhood, boys are indoctrinated into thinking that the highest proof of masculinity … Continue reading →

Posted in Boys, Masculinity, Parents, War | Tagged bullied, conscientious objectors, corrupted by violence, defend, different, different heroes, heroism, heroism romanticised, make society moral, masculinity, patriotism, peace activists, proof of masculinity, safe and free., war, weaker | Leave a comment

Socialized into Aggression

Posted on 03/03/2012 by caygin

Parents, and especially fathers, hold back from hugging and physically showing love to their sons. Underlining this behaviour is a fear of making a sissy of him, and a desire to make him ‘tough’. Boys are also physically punished more … Continue reading →

Posted in Boys, Masculinity, Parents, War | Tagged acceptance of violence, adult violence as entertainment, aggression, bullying, encourage boys to kill, Fathers, fighting, games, manliness, show love, sissy, sport aggression, toughen boys, tribal, uncivilised, videos | Leave a comment

Why is the Military Male?

Posted on 25/02/2012 by caygin

Why are the armed forces predominantly male? Is aggression simply a biological or genetic element of masculinity? Or do we train boys to become aggressive so that they are useful for war? It seems to me that it is difficult, … Continue reading →

Posted in Boys, Masculinity, Parents, War | Tagged arena for display of masculinity, competitive situations, complex, contradictions, male ego, military, protection of women, strength less relevant to modern warfare, testosterone and aggression, testosterone research, war predominantly male | Leave a comment

Difference = Fear = Aggression = Violence

Posted on 17/02/2012 by caygin

The fantasy of perfect masculinity – symbolized by the ideal soldier – ensures men will fight in wars, seduces them to be and live the fantasy. In a previous post, I wrote about the unemotional soldier*. Now I want to … Continue reading →

Posted in Boys, Masculinity, Parents, War | Tagged aggression, anger, annihilate, cultural racial religious prejudice, defending, enemy, greed, heroic, illogical, moral to kill, no compassion empathy or care, patriotic, patriotism, power, soft and unpatriotic, soldier, those who are ‘different’, useful myths, violence | Leave a comment

Two-dimensional Men

Posted on 09/08/2011 by caygin

In my last blog, I wrote about how boys are shamed into either hiding or suppressing some of their natural human emotions. And I asked the question: Do we raise our sons to be unemotional in order for them to … Continue reading →

Posted in Boys, Masculinity, Parents, War | Tagged ‘real’ men, detached marginalised father, emotional control, emotional disability, emotional self-protection, fantasy of perfect masculinity, ideal soldier, insecure masculinity, presentation of masculinity, self- protection, shame, taboo emotions, two-dimensional men | Leave a comment

Emotional Shut-down

Posted on 04/08/2011 by caygin

In my last post, I looked at one of the attributes of an ideal soldier: An ideal soldier is unemotional. Only anger and aggression are permissible. Do we raise our sons to be unemotional so that they can be useful … Continue reading →

Posted in Boys, Masculinity, Parents, War | Tagged ashamed, bullied, dependent, despised, disappoint, emotionally disabled, emotionally impoverished, failure, father’s mockery, fear, harden emotions, hide natural human feelings, humiliation, ideal soldier, inadequate, inferior, insecurity, loneliness, ostracized, rejected, self- protection, sensitivity, sissy, unemotional, vulnerable, weakness | Leave a comment